i'm coming slow but speeding...

Wednesday, March 29, 2006

are you happy now scott?! :p

its been one of those months where a lot has happened, and yet nothing at all at the same time.

- my spring break consisted of 2 days at home. the rest of the time, i was up at uconn struggling through a massive writer's block... which is still ongoing. this isnt just writer's block. my fingers and brain no longer work together. its incredibly disgruntling. i haven't even been able to write with a pen and paper. my attempts have landed me with one word on an otherwise blank sheet of paper... after 5 hours. im not used to wrier's block, so im not dealing with this bout particularly well. im just burnt out, i suppose.

- i've been the epitome ofa college slacker, due in no small part to my writer's block and being burnt out. all of my classes involve writing. so if i cant write, why would i go to them? convincing logic, eh? it also doesnt help that my sleep pattern's all thrown out of whack. despite setting 4 seperate alarms, im still able to sleep through them (and my classes) until 2pm on a regular basis. last i checked, thats not healthy. i went through the same thing right about this time last year too. whether this is the depression kicking back in, the lack of sunlight, me just getting disgruntled with my current situation, working ridiculously late, or other circumstances, i dont know. but i do know i'm the most well-rested i've been since my 2 month surgery recoop period :)

- in the past month, i fell for a boy, then came back down to reality, realized that certain unavoidable circumstances and situations were going to prevent anything in that arena, and have now conceded to being single again. but im honestly happy about that decision. 1. life is too short for me to feel miserable for myself because i'm single. 2. if you're wasting time worrying about it, then you're wasting your time. 3. we're still on speaking terms, and despite some things he's my friend, so i'm happy to have gained a very cool friend, notto mention quite a few of his friends are awesome people themselves. and number 4....

- as conceited as this is going to sound, i'm starting to make quite a name for myself in the hartford bar scene. i've earned the moniker "the hardest working girl in hartford" and have had random people come into the bar and ask me if that was me. apparently, i have more visitors than any of the other bartenders... many of whom i just flat out dont know. oh, and not to mention i have 3, thats right three, men at an neighboring bar all vying for my attention. i LOVE my job!! if i had a boyfriend right now, i seriously think he would just boil over with jealousy at the amount of attention i get there. that really REALLY sounds conceited, but seriously. if i saw my boy flirting with 5 different girls at once at his job, i'd be livid. so yeah, im having a grand time while it lasts.

- looks like i'll be going to the west hartfrod uconn next semester. 1. it saves me mucho money. 2. i'll be living with ryan for dirt cheap, and he lives 5 minutes from the WHU, which will save me gas money, mileage on my car, etc. 3. that also means i'll be living 5 minutes from koji. awesome. im not happy that i'll be far awat from my uconn people, but at least now i'll be in a happy medium place... 20 minutes from them, 20minutes from home. i think next semester i'll be much MUCH happier than i am now.

- oh, how silly of me to forget. I'M LIVING IN BOSTON OVER THE SUMMER. i am SO hyped, and though it isnt definite, i have to decide by saturday whether or not i'm really going to do this. i want to so badly, if for nothign else but toget out of conencticut for a little bit. i just have to figure out my finances in the next 48 hours, along with a whole shitload of other things

- you know, its funny. earlier i was complaining about writer's block, ive written like a page and a half here, and could easily keep going. im willing to bet the writer's block is just me being pouty about having to write so much. which sucks, because i have to write around 25 pages tonight. before 11am thursday morning. i SUCK at doing schoolwork.

i think i'm gonna go get ice cream and go grocery shopping instead. horray procrastination!

every day things change, basically they stay the same

jules was lost in thought at 6:06 PM

Comments:

looking back at this post....

dear lord things have since then. i was such an idealistic little girl back then.

that boy i had fallen for turned out to be a man of less-than-savory character. good riddance to bad garbage. i never moved in with ryan; we dont even speak anymore. i didnt live in boston for the summer. so as hopeful as this postwas, only one thing came to fruition...

the only thing of any pertinence in this entire post is how i regained a friendship i never should have lost in the first place. Sean, thats you. of everything mentioned in this rant, youre the only thing thats remained in my life. thank you.

# posted by

jules : 11:06 PM